Notes to the Lord:Everything Does Not Turn Out the Way We Would Like

Scripture Reflections:Matthew 17

22When they came together in Galilee, he said to them, "The Son of Man is going to be betrayed into the hands of men. 23They will kill him, and on the third day he will be raised to life." And the disciples were filled with grief.

Lord Jesus--I never really thought about it before but these two incident really go together...your coming death and the temple tax are a part of the same puzzle...a part of the same rejection.

You were rejected by those you came to save. Was that the way it had to be? Not if I really believe in free will. The religious elite of your day had a much a choice as I do...and they rejected you.

But for the disciples large theological questions would have to wait. They were cycling through their grief and grieving takes energy and time. Step one in the greiving process is denial...that is the reason for the frequent reminders of what going to Jerusalem meant.

24After Jesus and his disciples arrived in Capernaum, the collectors of the two-drachma tax came to Peter and asked, "Doesn't your teacher pay the temple tax?"25"Yes, he does," he replied.When Peter came into the house, Jesus was the first to speak. "What do you think, Simon?" he asked. "From whom do the kings of the earth collect duty and taxes—from their own sons or from others?" 26"From others," Peter answered.

Lord Jesus--This was another teaching moment for Peter...showing him in another context that those who were in charge of temple worship did not accept your leadership. They did not accept your identity, they did not see you as a son but as someone who was "other."

"Then the sons are exempt," Jesus said to him. 27"But so that we may not offend them, go to the lake and throw out your line. Take the first fish you catch; open its mouth and you will find a four-drachma coin. Take it and give it to them for my tax and yours."

Remind me again Lord that you are the one who has all the dollars and cents worked out. You own the cattle on a thousand hills and all of the nickels, numbers and noses are available to you.

You are the one who knows where all the fish are and what is in their mouths. Teach me to trust that you are in control of what appear to be problems that crop up in my way. You are in control and know what needs to happen. Each incident can be a teaching moment even on the way to Jerusalem...there were lessons that needed to be learned and filed away. Continue your shaping process in my life Lord Jesus.

Notes to the Lord:Where does my faith end?

Scripture Reflection: Matthew 17

¹⁴When they came to the crowd, a man approached Jesus and knelt before him. ¹⁵"Lord, have mercy on my son," he said. "He has seizures and is suffering greatly. He often falls into the fire or into the water. ¹⁶I brought him to your disciples, but they could not heal him."

Lord Jesus--I can understand the way the disciples must have felt...they had watched you and they had been delegated this responsibility. Yet they could not complete the task. I know that I have learned from failures...but they are never comfortable.

¹⁷"O unbelieving and perverse generation," Jesus replied, "how long shall I stay with you? How long shall I put up with you? Bring the boy here to me." ¹⁸Jesus rebuked the demon, and it came out of the boy, and he was healed from that moment.

All it took was a word from you and the boy was relieved of this demon that had chased him and made his life twisted and crisis driven. A future was given, a family restored by your simple word. The same voice that had spoken creation into existence spoke mercy and hope into a life that had seen to much fire and water, too much oppression.

Lord Jesus--Speak the words of power where my life has been twisted and crisis driven. There are places where I can go only by those words of power being spoken...words of release and hope come from your grace and unmerited mercy.

19Then the disciples came to Jesus in private and asked, "Why couldn't we drive it out?" 20He replied, "Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, can say to this mountain, 'Move from here to there' and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.'

It is all about faith and growing faith in my life. "I believe Lord, Help my unbelief"...comes to mind. That was a father's prayer in a similar situation. I haven't seen many moving mountains so, I think we are all in about the same situation...growing faith a bit at a time. Lord Jesus have your way in my heart and life and find ways to grow my faith in the days ahead.

Upfront and personal
So what about the times when my faith is just not up to the challenge? It is to the point where my faith ends that you bring me again and again...it is the only way to see miracles happen. I have to come face to face with the impossible and allow you to work. I can see the places where the impossible needs to happen Lord.

So my prayer right now is Jesus work...push my faith down the road a bit further today.

Notes to the Lord;Expectation and the Cross

Scripture Reflections:Matthew 17

9As they were coming down the mountain, Jesus instructed them, "Don't tell anyone what you have seen, until the Son of Man has been raised from the dead."

Lord Jesus--There is something about expectations and about the way in which you work that catches me by surprise. It is the same thing that left the disciples surprised and frighten at times. High points are many times the places where right turns are just ahead, that lead to places I would never expect to end up.

The disciples did not want to hear the teachings of the cross, and this reference to telling people about this incident of your glory after your being raised from the dead must have jarred their sense of the future.

10The disciples asked him, "Why then do the teachers of the law say that Elijah must come first?" 11Jesus replied, "To be sure, Elijah comes and will restore all things. 12But I tell you, Elijah has already come, and they did not recognize him, but have done to him everything they wished. In the same way the Son of Man is going to suffer at their hands."13Then the disciples understood that he was talking to them about John the Baptist.

Lord Jesus--In the middle of their expectations they were face to face with the future which you knew and saw racing full speed toward them. They had expectations about the future that would be brought face to face with the cross...unblinkingly they would have to come the end of their own expectations and dreams of the future.

Up close and personal
What do you see of the future for me and this group that you have gathered at Living Springs? I am sure that my expectations will be continued to be jarred and wrenched free from where they are currently. There is still the call to follow even when expectations and reality are not the same. There is still that still clear voice that calls me to discipleship and obedience. Your voice leads me by the way of your cross. Through it to see your glory and experience your life lived out through my wandering steps. Jesus lead on in this day that will dawn in just a few hours. Help me to allow you to mold and temper my expectations with your unending and patient grace.

Notes to the Lord: Kissing the Ground when Necessary

Matthew 16:28-17:6
28I tell you the truth, some who are standing here will not taste death before they see the Son of Man coming in his kingdom."
1After six days Jesus took with him Peter, James and John the brother of James, and led them up a high mountain by themselves.2There he was transfigured before them. His face shone like the sun, and his clothes became as white as the light. 3Just then there appeared before them Moses and Elijah, talking with Jesus.

Lord Jesus--I wonder if Peter and James and John got it...that this was the Son of Man coming in his Kingdom...at least in a taiste of it. Here is just a bit of the glory that will be the center of the kingdom that is to come. Rapped up in light and glory, surrounded by the heroes of ages past. That will be sight to see.

⁴Peter said to Jesus, "Lord, it is good for us to be here. If you wish, I will put up three shelters—one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah."

I have a feeling that this was the last place that Peter thought he fit in...he wanted there to be some kind of controls, somekind of structure to this experience that he found himself in. There are times when it is just too free form for me too, this life that you have called me to. I can understand how Peter felt. By attempting to control the uncontrollable Peter missed out on experiencing the moment.

⁵While he was still speaking, a bright cloud enveloped them, and a voice from the cloud said, "This is my Son, whom I love; with him I am well pleased. Listen to him!"

Lord Jesus--The validation and interaction with the Father was the reason that You came up the mountain with the Peter, James and John. You came up the mountain to bring the disciples face to face with the glory that you left by coming to earth, and that you deserve.

6When the disciples heard this, they fell facedown to the ground, terrified. 7But Jesus came and touched them. "Get up," he said. "Don't be afraid." 8When they looked up, they saw no one except Jesus.

Lord Jesus--I am just like the these three followers of yours, I can only handle a bit of the realization of Your glory...of the majesty and power that you possess. Yet I still want to go up the mountain with you, I can still be hard to handle after all these years.

So what is the application? Where is the upfront and personal? You ask me to take each day with what it offers to me without the need to control the outcomes, if I feel overwhelmed I can always kiss the ground like Peter, James and John did and I will be in pretty good company.

Lord Jesus work in this day...

Notes to the Lord:Watching the River Run

Scripture Reflections: Matthew 16

27For the Son of Man is going to come in his Father's glory with his angels, and then he will reward each person according to what he has done.

Lord Jesus--In the middle of doing life, it is real easy to think that this will last forever. Sometimes I even want it to. In the mix of following you and of doing my best to lead, I need to be reminded from time to time that this is not all there is. It is not just about family, and friends and a place on this earth...heaven is around the next corner. Rewards await, based on grace, and faithfulness to the task will be rewarded. Children raised well are their own reward: to see them sinking their roots deep in You, in relationships of worth and in work that is worth doing.

But heaven awaits...there will be a time when we will meet face to face. As I write these lines, I know that we have never met, except in that still quiet place of my soul. You have spoken to me in a way that I really can't describe of grace, of kindness and of mercy. There have been times where You have been present in such reality that further explanation for the need of faithfulness seems shallow. I follow to find another drink from that water...to see that water running in my life.

John 7

³⁷On the last and greatest day of the Feast, Jesus stood and said in a loud voice, "If anyone is thirsty, let him come to me and drink.³⁸Whoever believes in me, as the Scripture has said, streams of living water will flow from within him."

Flow within my life Lord Jesus...like water bringing life where ever you touch.

Note to the Lord: Letting Go

Matthew 16

25For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it. 26What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?

Lord Jesus--I have been thinking a bit about holding on and letting go. Sometimes I hold on for dear life when the best thing to do would be just to let go and see what happens. That is the growing edge.

I am sure that it is something about control and the need to feel safe, but that piece is there no matter how much I try to not look at that part of my soul. It is the republican part...the part that remembers times long past when need was large and resources were limited. It is the part that wants to conserve just for the sake of conserving.

Lord Jesus as you said these words you saw the cross ahead of you. You knew what was coming long before it arrived. There is always risk in the letting go. You showed me how to let go. You demomstrated living through the risk...the dieing. You did not conserve yourself and you could have. Amazing!

There is a truth in the simple fact that there are places that I can only get to as I am open to your leading and sometimes that means letting go of things which were tightly held at one point to see how you will use them. You have to have room enough in my heart and life to work. It is a lesson that I keep having to learn.

Lord work as you see fit...even in the letting go.

Notes to the Lord: More Teachings on The Cross

Matthew 16

24Then Jesus said to his disciples, "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow me.

Lord Jesus--This is not something that I like to hear in the middle of life that runs by me at 74 miles an hour. You and I both know that I always go just on the edges of trouble which right now on the New York State thruway is 74. That just is the way that I am. It is within the context of a careening life lived at 74 miles per hour, the lesson of the cross surfaces for me again.

At this point in my walk with you, Lord Jesus, I firmly believe in Divine appointments. Lessons learned from you do not come by accident...there is the Divine at work in the synchronicity of life. There are times of teaching when I need to catch what you are bringing into my life. Does that mean that you bring pain into my life? No, but everything and anything can be worked into the lesson...just like a good teacher does. Life is your class room for the formation not just of my mind but of my soul.

What was the cross for you Lord Jesus?

It was a place that you did not want to go to, but freely choose at the direction of the Father. It was a place of execution, and death. The cross was obedience summed up in two pieces of wood. You were there when trees were created and yet you allowed yourself to be stretched out on that wood. Amazing.

Lord Jesus--You know why this reminder has come when it has...I hear your call. A call to slowing it down a notch or to...listening and then obey even within a life that is lived out much too fast. It is in the middle of life that you form and shape my soul into your likeness.